Chewbacca 127

Chewbacca doesn’t cook. He simply points at his table and a five star gourmet meal appears out of thin air.

Chewie Fact 126

When not fighting the Evil Empire or hanging out with Spiderman, Chewie satisfies his  need for attention by performing as a Wookiee cannonball in an intergalactic circus. This may sound pathetic, but all that hair causes a lot of drag, so you can tell he’s really booking it. Plus he’s still wearing his bandoleer in case he needs to kill something in middle of flying through the air. That’s pretty impressive if you think about it.

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Chewie Fact 125

Chewbacca taught Lance Armstrong how to ride the bike.

Chewbacca Joke 124

Chuck Norris counted to infinty, twice. Not to be outdone, Chewbacca counted to infinty, infinty times.

Chewbacca joke 123

Chewbacca can have his cake and eat it too. If you even think about trying to stop him from doing this he will eat you. Seriously.

Chewbacca Joke 122

Chewbacca is a better dancer than Michael Jackson. Times 10.

Chewie Fact 121

The movie Jurassic Park was based on the events that transpired when Chewbacca made some dinosaurs out of thin air and released them into a shopping mall.

Chewbacca Joke 120!

Chewbacca has a pet T-Rex in his Paris apartment, along with a collection of small amphibious pandas.

Chewie Fact 119

Chewbacca was a contestant on Dancing With The Stars, until he tore a judge’s arms off after an unfavorable comment.

Chewie Joke/Factoid 118

Chewbacca once transformed himself into cardboard. Why? Because he can, and if you question Chewie’s decision he will literally end you. Literally.

Chewbacca Joke 117

Chewbacca doesn’t use spellcheck, because the words automatically arrange themselves correctly in fear of being uber-killed by Chewie’s furious Wookiee Roar.

Chewbacca joke 116

Chewie doesn’t need to use pesticides on his garden to keep bugs away. This is because if the insects even think about eating some of Chewie’s plants they will spontaneously combust on the spot. That’s just how awesome Chewbacca is.

Chewie Fact 115

In the original grading system, there were only A’s, D’s, and F’s. The B’s and C’s were added later because Chewbacca felt that he should have a part in deciding the fate of millions of lives, and added his initials to the sytem: C B.

Chewie Joke 114

When Chewbacca looks in the mirror, he sees no reflection. This is not only due to the fact that he is a vampire, but also because there can only be one Chewbacca.

Chewbacca Joke 113

Chewbacca is actually a Transformer. He transforms into a turbo powered Ferrari, which has built in rocket lasers and an iPod docking station.

chewie joke 112

Head Chef Ramsay from Hell’s Kitchen once challenged Chewbacca to a cook off. Chef Ramsay ceases to exist.

chewie joke 111

 

 

Chewie works as a babysitter part time, because his fur is deadly enough to poison a city block, yet it can calm a baby to sleep.

CHEWBACCA JOKE 110

Contrary to popular belief, Han Solo was actually Chewbacca’s sidekick.

Chewbacca joke 109

Chewbacca was best friends with Da Vinci.

Chewbacca joke 108

Chewbacca ran a marathon around the equator of the Earth….in four seconds.

Chewbaccca joke 107

 

Chewie invented chess because he didn’t like checkers.

Chewbacca Fact 106

One kiss from Chewbacca can cause a nuclear explosion.

Chewbacca joke 106

The Holy Grail is actually located in Chewbacca’s kitchen, unknown to millions of seekers.

Chewbacca joke 105

Never tell  Chewie to ‘fetch’. He will tear your arms out of their sockets.

chewbacca fact 104

Chewbacca doesn’t use hot sauce. He simply travels to active volocanoes and uses molten lava as a topping on his chili.